Pictures are coming - just scroll down if you want to see them first!
We went for our first morning visit today from 9 to 10am here. It was crisp and cool and Zeph (Wallace) did not want to keep his hat on but the caregiver with us suggested (we don't want to break any rules so we let them lead) to just put his sweat-shirt hood on, which he could not remove. We mostly just walked him around and let him look at leaves on trees, touch them, throw them, blow "wind" on them. We're trying to work on showing him he can't throw everything - but it's a work in progress and we don't want to ruin our visits with rules and frustration - there will be plenty of learning the ropes at home. For now we just want him to know we are here and love him and we want him to trust us as much as is possible in this short time we have with him.
During the second visit (another 2 mile walk to and from the orphanage and our apartment - we are getting fit here!) - for some reason we were not told of - a doctor there (a very nice lady, from what we have seen) did not want him to go outside or in the "play/therapy" room - instead they put two chairs in the entry room to his groupa's play area/room, gave us two toys for him, and closed the door. I do not think ours was an isolated case as someone else seemed to have been visiting a child the same way just as we were arriving. Routine is already a bit off - we came that morning. Routine is off because, well, we are a new thing for him. Now even that NEW routine is "off" - he is expecting us to take him out for "adventure" and "play" time - "discovery" time. And here we sit - he got no further than the entry-way/room - the one he sees all day long. Bo-ring! (to him). Further - we didn't know what they would think if we let him play on the floor there so we just kept him on our laps - back and fourth. It was quite the challenge. He kept looking at the window, pointing at the door and begging us to take him away. We couldn't. And we didn't know how to tell him why or that we wanted to but were sorry to have to stay put. It was difficult to distract him, occupy him, it was not the best way to bond with our child. But we were happy to have him with us and to be "practicing" as I know it will be difficult to have him on the plane and train home! We also figured out today that the cute jeans we brought for him and one of the long-sleeve t-shirts will fit him for "gotcha day" - but, alas, the hat will not. He's a big boy! So we either have to let him borrow his big brother's hat or find him a new one.
We have court tomorrow so please be praying it all goes smoothly and that God will give us favor in the sight of the people who will make these important decisions in our adoption case. Time to iron our clothes, set things out, pray, make sure we pack the photo album to show the judge! I hope to have the most happy update for you all tomorrow!!!
Stacking cups - boy did we figure out lots of ways to have fun with these!
A "Joot-joot" train :)
Such a cutie. Good luck at court. I will be praying for you.
ReplyDeleteKatrina
Carlene's soon to be momma :)
www.operationorphannomore.blogspot.com
why does adoption cost so much? It would seem that these countries do not want these children and would be happy to be rid of them. Do they use any of the money for the children left behind? Does anyone know what they do with the moeny? I am sure more people would adopt if it was more affordable. I am so happy for you in your adoption. I only wish the best for you.
ReplyDeleteThank you katrina! Court went well!
ReplyDeleteAnonymous: Adoption does not have to cost very much. In fact, adoption through our own foster-care system is almost free - and there is usually adoption aid available, depending on what state you are in. Domestic adoption can be inexpensive or VERY expensive, depending on the situation and agency or if it is independent or step-parent adoption. International adoption costs vary from country to country and also depending upon what agency or if it is independent adoption. International adoption costs so much more usually because there are so many people involved to safe-guard children and policy and citizens coming and going with passports, visas, translators, drivers... there is so much more paperwork involved - maybe some of it is not necessary but each country decides what is most important to them, including the USA. Though some of our facilitation fee includes an orphanage donation which will benefit the children that remain in the orphanage, there is still a need for ministries who specifically give to and minister to orphans and orphanages since not all children can be (legally) or will be adopted. These countries are not happy to "get rid" of any of their children. Though conditions are very poor and in some places the workers or managers may not care much - the particular orphanage we are adopting from seems to care very much for the children there (though I'm sure nobody is perfect and there is always room for improvement) and they are so happy to see our son come into a loving good family. They are very open to adoptions here, it seems. It all varies not only by country but also by region.
thank you for your response. I was really refering to the ones who don't care. I wish more people were like you and I only wish the best for you.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome - I wanted to respond in case anyone else reading had similar questions. Thank you for your kind wishes. Yes, sadly, some places and people do not care for their orphans, especially if they have any type of special need then they are seen as "sub-human". A lot of times, though, it is due to poverty and "survival of the fittest" thinking. The least funded places are the mental institutions, which is where our little "Wallace" (Zephaniah) would have ended up in 2 or 3 years. If there is cognitive delay or inability to walk or sometimes if they simply look different then that is where they go and there is less funds, less care, less food, etc. That's why more children die once they are transferred to such places once they age out of the "baby house". We have friends who are here who's little boy they are adopting has only recently been in the mental institution for 3 months - 3 months too long and it had already set him back and probably worn on his spirit too. I am so glad they are getting him out of there!
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